Prayer Changes "Things"? No, Prayer Changes ME

A Facebook friend of mine wrote the following today and I think it bears repeating:

"I came across a post for a group called, "Prayer Changes Things". As I paused to consider what that really means, it occurred to me prayer does not just change things or make things better, but in a real sense changes us. 

When we pray for our enemies; those who hate and despise us, those who have taken things we valued or loved; when we speak those names as we ask God to bless them, it is our heart that softens. 

When we pray daily, we are continually confronted with names that when uttered brought pain, rejection, shame, bitterness. However, as we remain faithful those names become a source of love and empathy. We begin to see others as no different than ourselves; hurt, sinful beings craving acceptance and love." ~ Petros H. Thorp

I have found this to be so very true.

In Orthodoxy, one doesn't tell God what to do about the people we pray for. The formula is, "Please remember in Your Kingdom {insert name here}". This comes only after praying for forgiveness for our own sins and a declaration that I, like St Paul said, am the chiefest of sinners. Anything someone else has done to me I have done and more. Hearing the names of those I can barely look at coming from my lips points up to me that God loves them too, and He will deal with their sin just as He will deal with mine. And neither of us has sinned against each other, but against Him, and His is the only opinion that counts. 

Realize I am speaking in ideal terms here. Great pain and all that goes along with it is just as hard to give up as great pleasure sometimes. It becomes an old friend and a comfortable place to be. The thing is, that pain will become an anchor holding you back from anything else good that is out there for you. The more you pray for those who have caused that pain, the more links of the chain holding the anchor get drawn up. Each time their name parts your lips, the chain moves, lifting that anchor higher until it is finally out of the water.

And then you go to work on the other anchors.

Christ said, "For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you; but if you do not forgive others, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses."

It's hard work. Yes, work. It's one of the many works God has for us to do as we work out our salvation in fear and trembling. Salvation is free but it requires our participation. It isn't cheaply given fire insurance. It's an investment and the principle in that investment is our whole life.

So I suck it up and say the names. The first time it happened, I did it out of nothing but pure obedience. My Spiritual Father told me I had to do it so I did it. Obedience is better than sacrifice, right?

I puked afterward. Literally. And I swore that wasn't going to happen again. Food should stay down. When it comes back up it hurts. I was NOT doing that again if this was the result.

I lied. I did it again a few days later. My stomach roiled but everything stayed down, praise God. A few months  later (read that as years, but years are made of months so it's technically true), I could do it without even a hint of nausea. Go me.

I cannot say that I enjoy it. I'd rather do many other things but just praying the names of those who have hurt me so badly has lanced and begun to drain that wound. Infection will kill you from the inside out. And prayer is way less painful in the long run than any solutions I have come up with late at night, up to and including hiring Boba Fett or a Drow mercenary force. (Dark elves will do anything if the price is right.)

I digress.

St Nikolai Velimirovic said it best:

My
 enemies have taught me to know what hardly anyone knows, that a person has no enemies in the world except himself.
One hates his enemies only when he fails to realize that they are not enemies, but cruel friends.
It is truly difficult for me to say who has done me more good and who has done me more evil in the world: friends or enemies.
Therefore bless, O Lord, both my friends and my enemies.
A slave curses his enemies, for he does not understand.
But a son blesses them, for he understands.
For a son knows that his enemies cannot touch his life.
Therefore he freely steps among them and prays to God for them.
Bless my enemies, O Lord.
Even I bless them and do not curse them.

Lord have mercy on me, a sinner.

Relevant Reading
1 Timothy 1:12-16
Matthew 6:9-15
Ephesians 2:8-10
Philippians 2:12-15
The Spiritual Father in Orthodox Christianity
St. Nikolai Velimirovic
The Enemy Within
Thorp Studios