Whither Shall I Wander?

Alleluia, Lord, to whom shall I go? You have the words of eternal life! Alleluia! Alleluia!

After hearing my conversion story, some have asked if I am going to remain Orthodox or keep searching for God. That sort of question troubled me until I realized that it is a legitimate question if you think that the point of a spiritual search is wandering aimlessly looking for you know not what. People in America have this tendency to think spiritual stuff is "out there" someplace and to seek after such a thing is to seek after something amorphous or imaginary at best, and perhaps hallucinatory and deceptive at worst. The thing is a search like this one, an honest spiritual journey, is not going to be undirected and it will have an end. 

Please bear with me. I make no claims to great wisdom, spirituality, or experience. I'm a hot, bubbling, mess and I know it. I do know that my search was directed because the Shepherd was calling for me. I heard His voice and knew it. When I called out (BAAAAA!) He sought me and I was found. Not the other way around. (And yes I know just how not complementary it is to be compared to a sheep. God does it anyway. He has to have a reason.)

"Which one of you, having a hundred sheep and losing one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the wilderness and go after the one that is lost until he finds it?" (Luke 15:4) Pretty much like a sack of potatoes over the Shepherd's shoulder to be placed with His flock in the fold (John 10:16). Christ did not leave the world when He ascended into heaven so what would be the point of seeking something else?

Safety is in the fold of His Church which He established. When I was found He caused my head to be anointed with oil, marked for and sealed to Him with the Holy Spirit. The still waters He leads me beside are in the eyes of the Holy Theotokos, His mother and all the saints. The rod and staff which are my comfort are here among the words of the Fathers and Mothers of the desert, His priests, and His Bishops who rightly divide the Word of Truth. The green grass on which I feast is His Body and Blood given to me for the healing of my soul and body and prepared on a table He spread before me.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow
     me all the days of my life,
and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord
     my whole life long.

Lord have mercy on me, a sinner.

Relevant Reading
Luke 15:4-7
John 10:1-18
Psalm 23