January

For me, the "New Year" doesn't actually begin until February. IN my little world, January is clean up time, perfect for reflecting about the previous year, finishing whatever needs finishing and planning for the year to come.

This year is especially exciting to me. I mean, I have a boatload of things I want to do this year, but at the very tippy, sharp-pointy top of the list is walking the stage at December commencement to receive my Masters of Library Science degree. For the first time ever (at least since childhood) I don't feel like school is a waste of time. Don't get me wrong, I liked school most of the time growing up, but I never focused on anything except graduating. After graduation from university, however, I was at a loss. There was nothing left to graduate from/to, as far as I could see. I had a B.A. in something I didn't really enjoy and didn't want to pursue so I just floated for many years. I had jobs but none that I could see myself doing for the next 40 years.

Then I got married, had a child and still didn't know what it was exactly I wanted to do with myself and I think that (among other things on both sides of the coin) contributed to that marriage ending.

Now, things are way different. Yes, I have something to graduate from but in the truest sense of the word, this will be a commencement and not a graduation. It will be a beginning, not just a ranking on a scale for me. I'm excited about what is going to happen next because I chose something that makes me happy instead of waiting for someone to do it. That makes this time doubly precious to me. It's a first. It's a treasure paid for with a great price and I am thankful to God for everything He brought me through because without that background, I would have no idea just how precious this is to me.

Amazing. I never would have thought that just a few years ago.

I do have a few loose ends to tie up from last year as well. In all the dramedy that was my life for the last, say, 14 months, some things got put off or put aside. Mainly for financial reasons. When you don't have a job that sort of thing happens. What passes for normality has reasserted itself now so I think I will be able to wind those up.

I also have a list of fun things I have wanted to do since forever that kept getting put off for this that and the other reason. It's amazing how much you can do if you just DO it and quit waiting for somebody else to decide to do whatever it is with you. I'm grown and there is very little on my "bucket list" that I can't do alone if I feel the urge.

Something is coming. I've decided to be ready for it.

Lord have mercy on me, a sinner.

King of Anything, Sara Bareilles cover by Sam Tsui